Gavin’s Gaily Gigest

Bounding in nervously like a young boy on his first day at a new school*, Nick Clegg, leader of the Liberal Democrats and MP for Sheffield Hallam, greeted the massed horde of Lib Dem bloggers with all the enthusiasm you’d expect from his youthful good looks and powerful sex-drive.

Thanks to Millennium Elephant and Daddy Richard, I was lucky enough to be among such blogging luminaries as Paul Walter, Linda Jack, Alix Mortimer, Helen Duffett, Jo Christie-Smith and Laurence Boyce last night, as we grilled our Glorious Leader. As with the Ed Davey interview in February, I won’t give a blow-by-blow account of the evening, mostly because my memory isn’t that good and nor are my notes, but I’ll try to pick out a few of the more interesting moments.

Richard kicked things off, asking whether Boris Johnson should resign his Henley seat** and are we ready for when he does. Nick (predictably) answered "of course" to the first, going so far as to criticise the "cat and mouse game" the new Mayor of London is playing with his Henley constituents by holding off the by-election and leaving everyone guessing as to when it will be. He thinks it odd that we could have two by-elections in a row where the defending party will be keeping it in the family (Tasmin Dunwoody in Crewe and Nantwich and potentially Stanley Johnson in Henley), but believes that if the Liberal Democrats campaign well, we have a chance.

 
The pheromones are working on Jo

Alix then turned things round to her specialist subject, tax, asking why haven’t we made more of our solution to the 10p tax problem. Nick defended himself, stating we did up in Sheffield and other northern towns that he campaigned in last month. He even believes this contributed to the win in Sheffield.

Laurence interjected at this point, inquiring whether he likes Tory leader David Cameron. Alix has already written up his response and I can’t do better than her precis, except to add that I love the phrase "Janus-faced". Nothing like a reference to an obscure Roman god to demonstrate you’re down with the common man.

Jo asked Nick what the Liberal Democrats "narrative"*** is, which lead to a fairly long discourse on not just that (our narrative is apparently some inspirational mix of power, empowerment and change), but also on whether we should be attempting to harness the reach of the mass media or instead try and go over their heads direct to the people and local and regional newspapers. He doubts the cost / benefit of expending an enormous amount of energy trying to get a couple of extra lines in a national paper, which is why he has spent the last few months go up and down the country hosting town hall meetings. He did, however, recently "rant" at the editorial team of a national newspaper for failing to discuss politics in the way his constituents understand. Their London-centric focus on politics doesn’t work in Sheffield as they have a two-party system in the city: Labour vs. Liberal Democrats.

My question to him was a tame one as I chickened out of following up on Guido’s crowing about Clegg’s expenses (mostly because I don’t really care): What single piece of legislation would you repeal and why?**** After a longer-than-expected pause the answer came: ID Cards, because of their "totemic value" - the legislation says  a lot about the current imbalance between the State and individual.

I’m sure the others will shortly be putting up their write-ups of the night, but until then, here are my favourite Nick Clegg quotes of the night:

• On the BBC’s election night coverage: "Jeremy Vine might as well scribble things on his tummy"
• On the Labour / Tory turns in office: "Buggins turn to bugger it up"
• On Nadine Dorries: "That nasty woman"

Paul Walter has also picked out some choice quotational cuts for you hungry people to chew over with your ocular muscles.

And so Nick Clegg was whisked away from us by his Mummy a phone call from a minder Hannah. He’ll next be subjecting himself to the fawning wrath of the Lib Dem bloggers in Sheffield, probably over the summer.

* Or possibly Tigger.
** 3 days, 22 hours and 20 minutes and counting…
*** The Centre for Policy Studies define "narrative" in their 2008 guide to the political lexicon:

"Narrative: spin, an attempt to provide a common theme to a range of  proposals where none exists. Unintentional admission that politics is now equivalent to fiction."

**** Yeah, cheesy I know.